Chardonnay’s Show Us Ya Twinkle Trail – R*n 1441
24 October 2024 from Cornelian Bay
Hare: TwinkleToes
Run Reporter: Grizzly

It is an undisputed FACT¹ that it NEVER rains on a Hash trail. It it also a FACT² that it ALWAYS rains on Hobart Show Day. Sure enough, as Hare TwinkleToes and her semi-domesticated dog walker Dyke set out with chalk and flour, the rain that turns a crispy dagwood dog into a limp, soggy sausage swept over the greater Hobart area.

These dark clouds and scudding showers threatened to overthrow FACT-1, but after a mighty battle of meteorological truisms, Hashers could assemble under clear skies.

It is also a FACT that Cornelian Bay is the windiest, coldest spot north of Antarctica, so there’s that.

With the Pack decimated by the absence of COVID cruisers, public holiday lethargists and non-believers in the power of FACT-1, it was a boutique group that assembled to tell new pooch Randall that he’s the goodest boy and set off on TwinkleToe’s trail.

Maximus obligingly gave his only other running companion – Hooray – a head start, disguising it by holding his wrist out for five minutes, pretending to catch the attention of one of Elon Musk’s satellites.

Trail set off toward the cemetery, but instead of the expected tour of headstones we were sent behind the crematorium and down a leafy path that could well have counted as virgin territory. Judging by the nicknames on some of the plaques and the respectfully-placed Bundy and cola cans, the path was part of a memorial garden for the natives north of Creek Road.

Leaving the sanctuary of the garden we crossed the rivulet and headed up Risdon Road. Ahead we could see Maximus and Hooray running around in ever-decreasing circles, while at our feet lay an FT mark. Thinking that the runners had overrun trail – because, well, they’re runners – we turned and looked for true trail, superior in our belief that the runners would have to make the run of shame back past us.

After a loop around Apex Park, we found the check on Lennox Avenue that the runners had been flummoxed by, which explained why were weren’t hearing Hooray’s heavy breathing behind us. Spoof went the extra mile in checking one of the options, and in doing so found the inward trail and didn’t go the extra mile.

As trail continued to wind its way to the higher parts of Lutana it seemed that the Hare had a bad case of the staggers in a laneway between Ashbolt and Lime Rd, as trail veered straight into a brick wall. Thinking that this might be a Platform 9¾ thing, Grizzly took the wall head-on*. The wall won, but it was a near thing.

* Head-on is a figure of speech, clearly it would have been gut-first

Trail continued to the summit of Lutana – the Hare clearly being influenced by Dyke because he’s an arsehole, and we wouldn’t think that of Twinkle. By this stage the Pack had dwindled to a small performing troupe of clowns that had been kept together by well-placed checks and FTs.

With no more ‘up’ to be found, the return journey was less taxing. Xena felt the pull of home but was chided into following trail, which she (and others) did to the fullest extent when it headed up and around a cul-de-sac even though it was fairly obvious that there was no other exit point.

The Hare Consort and a brace of now shivering SCBs were located at the entrance to Marine Esplanade, bravely delving into an ice-filled Esky and holding their Hash-mandated ‘one drink’ with a range of makeshift stubbie holders in order to ward off frost-bite.

A very good trail – well done TwinkleToes.

At the on-on, Twinkle set out an array of cold meats – they were probably hot when she put them out – non-meats, salads and rolls, which were eagerly attacked. As many a Hasher worshiped at the alter of the Council-provided barbecues, the Hash gods declared ‘job done’ and normal Hobart Show Day weather resumed, and all three FACTS maintained the appropriate level of factiveness.

DOWN DOWNS

Slippery Nipple presiding over a quick (therefore ‘good’) Lip session.

• TwinkleToes – the Hare.
• Bad News, W3 and Xena – c*untry members.
• Hooray – proxy for Snack Bar, who left early with a long list of skols left in abeyance.

Skols from the floor:

• Lone Arranger – first mail at the new house was from the Bowel Cancer Screening Program. Opened it in front of the real estate people and proudly blurted out that her ‘poos were good!’
• Bad News and Xena – taking refuge from the rain under a section of the shelter that had no sheet metal.

NEXT RUN

Run 1442: 31 October 2024 HALLOWEEN THEME!
HARE APPARENT: Prickit
STARTING FROM: Cooleys Hotel, Moonah – beer garden
RUN REPORTER: Arsecutter
$10 run fee – includes PS, buy your own food and drinks at the venue.

RECEDING HARELINE

UP CUMMING EVENTS

• 6 December 2024 | Hobart Posh Hash 1920s cocktail evening @ Big O’s Juke Joint
• 9 December | Sydney Posh H3 3000th Run
• 25 December | Christmas Day Hash @ Legacy Park Community Hub
• 16 January 2025 | Chardonnay Hobart H3 Annual General P!ss Up
• 28-30 March 2025 | Aussie Nash Hash 2025, Fremantle
• 8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

HASH FLASH

All the photos from Run 1440

MISMANAGEMENT 2024

Contacts for committee members.. tho’ its just as easy to use messenger.. or just ask a stupid question on the facebook page… There will always be someone willing to give you an answer.