Chardonnay’s Uber Eats Run
4 September 2025 from The Talbot Hotel
Hares: Snack Bar and Uber
Run Reporter: Red Dress

It might have been the first day of Spring, but someone clearly forgot to notify the
weather gods — or perhaps they were just having a laugh. The mercury barely
registered, and the wind had bite, but that didn’t stop a determined (if slightly
shivering) crew of Chardonnay Hashers from fronting up at the Talbot Hotel for
another Thursday trot.

With several regulars out of action due to injury or absence (we assume some were
simply curled up in front of a fire with a nice red), a small but mighty pack of runners
bravely layered up and headed out. It was very much a case of keep moving or
freeze solid — Hash survival 101. We briefly had a live hare in the form of Snack Bar, who took off with a grin… only to be caught a short while later. As tradition dictates, we did exactly what you’re meant to do when the hare is caught — we won’t go into detail, but let’s just say Snack Bar may never run live again.

Wee Bev, Can’t Stop, Hooray and Red Dress made a formidable foursome until the
infamous grassy knoll north of Forster Street turned the trail into an off-road
adventure. 4×4 mode was absolutely required as we slipped and slid uphill, each
step questioning our life choices. After that, the trail spread out, and it got a bit lonely up front — just you, your frosty breath, and the comforting smell of bread baking as we passed the warm, teasing glow of the local bakery. Torture. A few cheeky spits of rain hurried things along as we made our way back via Augusta Road and down Clare Street. Somewhere along Newtown Road, a peculiar sight: Nancy Boy, braced against a stranger’s front fence like it owed him money, taking a much-needed breather (or perhaps staking out real estate?).

Moments later, Prickit and Brazilian were spotted with that guilty post-sprint glow — it turns out they’d already finished and hashed the guts out of it, but were shamed
into doing a few bonus laps up and down Newtown Road to rack up their mileage.
Honour restored. Meanwhile, the walkers were out in force and seemed to navigate the trail without too much trauma (or frostbite). Jack le Poo, Maxi, Xena, Herr Flick, Grizz, LA, In the Raw, Crusha, and a host of others successfully followed the scent of flour and made it back to the Talbot in one piece, if not a little wind-blown and weathered.

Despite the Antarctic conditions, the trail was a ripper — a bit of hill, a bit of suburbia, a sprinkle of rain, and a whole lot of hashing spirit. As always, it all ended back at the OnOn with cold drinks, warm company, and the quiet satisfaction of having conquered the coldest Spring debut in living memory.

DOWN DOWNS

Lip: Nancy Boy

• The Hares: Snack Bar and Uber
• Xena: For tripping over her own feet.
• Slippery Nipple: For slipping over her own feet.
• In The Raw: Left his phone behind after last week’s run.
• Morticia: For announcing that someone should try ringing ITR to let him know that he left his phone behind at last week’s run.
• Hooray and Pee Wee: Thought they would take advantage of the free food on the bar to discover that it was catering from a wake.
• Murray the Rat: Went to the US and thought he saw Donald Trump, but turns out it was Donald Duck.
• Scary Eyeball: Off to the US with her Kevlar vest to Make America Great Again. She also wants to know why she isn’t listed in the Epstein files.
• Wee Bev: Tagged Herr Flick with a find my phone tag, but lost the device that finds the tag.
• Growler: We all get injuries as we got older, but Growler’s is a special one that means she can’t handle balls anymore.
• Crusha: Stained a few things while looking after Murray the Rat’s house.
• C#n’t Remembers: Scary Eyeball, Murray the Rat, Pee Wee.
• Millstone: Nancy Boy – 500 runs, Crusha – 950 runs.

Skols from the floor:

• ITR>Platypussy: Told off all the young blokes at the bar who were waiting politely in the bar queue (as opposed to the far queue).
• Herr Flick>Nancy Boy: Made Platypussy come and pick him up so he wouldn’t get cream all over his car.
• Hand’s On>C#n’t Stop: Goes to Hand’s On’s cycling group then beats all the athletes.
• ITR>Scary Eyeball: Reckons the chips were pretty good – not floppy but nice and hard.

NEXT RUN

Run 1490: 11 September 2025
HARE APPARENT: Yes Please
STARTING FROM: The Globe Hotel
RUN REPORTER: Spoof
$5 run fee, buy your own food and drinks at the venue.

A note from the Hash Hops: Now that daylight savings is over, p*ss stops will be for special themed runs or to coincide with other events such as birthdays. If you would like a p*ss stop outside of this, please contact the JMs

A note from the JMs: A polite reminder to Hashers to please not BYO drinks (including from the p*ss stop) into a licensed venue. This can result in fines for both us and the venue and may jeopardize our ability to return for future events. 

RECEDING HARELINE

Roll up! Roll up! 
Check your diaries and tell Morticia when and where you might like to set a trail this year.  If you don’t know how to set one. Find a friend who can to help you!

UP CUMMING EVENTS

3 November | Combined Clubs Charity Run (supporting MND Tasmania) @ RYCT
26 November 2025 | Hobart Hash Harem 1400th Run @ Queens Head Hotel
8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

HASH FLASH

All the photos from Run 1489

MISMANAGEMENT 2025

Contacts for committee members.. tho’ its just as easy to use messenger.. or just ask a stupid question on the facebook page… There will always be someone willing to give you an answer.

Run reports: Please send directly to Xena by Sunday lunchtime at melaniebryant2901@gmail.com

If you are away the week you have been nominated to do a run report, could you please let Xena know so that a replacement can be organised.