Chardonnay’s Second Coming Run
16 October 2025 from Kingston Beach RSL
Hares: Red Dress
Run Reporter: Maximus

After the previous week’s bus run of the year, there was significant speculation on the extent to which Red Dress would try to raise the bar. Would there be Co-Op Toyota sponsored minibuses waiting to transport runners, walkers and NDIS walkers to far flung exotic locations beyond the Kingston Beach town boundaries? Would we get huge lollipops? And, most importantly, would there be sushi and ‘sabi for tea again? As eager hashers started arriving at the Kingston Beach RSL for the second week in a row, these and other existential questions weighed heavily on everyone’s minds.

Just prior to the 6.31 run start time, these questions began to be resolved one by one. First, there were no minibuses or lollipops in sight. And second, for tea we would be having Dave’s noodles – pictures of the noodle options being provided for the benefit of those who had forgotten their reading glasses or who were keen to know whether seafood extender would or would not be included with their meal. Instead, Mr Dress informed everyone that we would be in for an ‘undulating run/walk’.

According to a quick Google search I conducted, the definition of ‘undulating’ is “having a smoothly rising and falling form or outline”. Very usefully, an Irish example is provided by Google – “the undulating lanes of Northern Ireland”. Now, I’m not sure about the other walkers and runners, but within the first five minutes we headed straight up a hill that was about as far from undulating as Kingston Beach is from Belfast. From there, there were several undulations, but none that came vaguely close to lanes in Ulster (at least my experience of them). I’m guessing that Red Dress may have relied on Benjamin Norton Defoe’s New English Dictionary or possibly The Most Unreliable Bible Dictionary Ever as his source in enthusiastically proclaiming an undulating trail.

Definitions aside, Red Dress should be applauded for a run that was excellent. It was a good length at around 9km for runners and had every type of terrain that a hash run should. There was even Guiness and Guiness 0.0 available back at the RSL for us all to relax and dream about the undulating lanes of Northern Ireland.

On on, Maximus

DOWN DOWNS

Lips: Nancy Boy

• The Hare: Red Dress
• Nancy Boy: For pulling rank and thinking he is the highest man in Hash without the JMs or GM present.
• Hooray and Snack Bar: Were both spotted taking a detour on trail down to the ex-nudist beach but were disappointed to only find a 90-year-old bloke with his tackle out.
• Arsecutter: Avoided going up a hill by taking the scenic route, which took him up a hill twice as steep.
• Xena: Went to see if her super was on track and was told that the best plan for retirement was to work out the drop-dead date then work backwards from there.
• Luv Shack: Had a three-piece quartet play at her wedding. What happened to the other quarter?
• Smallgoods: Happy birthday fark ewe.
• Can’t remembers: Smallgoods, Luv Shack and Morticia.
• Morticia: Visited a fun park while away and could only fit on the kiddie rides.
• Snack Bar: Far coughing all the way to China to visit his mates Sum Yung Kun and Wan Hung Lo.

Skols from the floor:

Jack Sh*t>Red Dress: Didn’t take the ageing Hashers into account with his Dave’s Noodles menu, which had tiny writing.

Morticia>Growler and Uber: Caught Hashing the trail.

NEXT RUN

Run 1496: 23 October 2025
HARE APPARENT: Twinkletoes
STARTING FROM: John Turnbull Park Cnr Creek and Lenah Valley Roads, Lenah Valley
RUN REPORTER: Slippery Nipple
$20 run fee, food provided, BYO drinks.

RECEDING HARELINE

Roll up! Roll up! 
Check your diaries and tell Morticia when and where you might like to set a trail this year.  If you don’t know how to set one. Find a friend who can to help you!

UP CUMMING EVENTS

3 November | Combined Clubs Charity Run (supporting MND Tasmania) @ RYCT
26 November 2025 | Hobart Hash Harem 1400th Run @ Queens Head Hotel
8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

A note from Pee Wee: Nash Hash 2027 Ballina NSW

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Nash Hash seems a long way off, but there seems there are a good number of Tassie Hashers from all clubs who are joining the ‘Gray Nomads’ brigade and have camper homes, caravans, camper trailers etc.

My thoughts are, if enough are interested to make up a convoy to depart all on the same ferry, slowly travel to Ballina and Hash on the way. Route and stopovers to be decided by the group. All staying in the same caravan park in Ballina.

The reason for such an early notice is to book ferry places and any caravan parks on the way. Short notice bookings on the ferry is nigh impossible.

All interested, contact Pee Wee (the short one) on 0478 834 716 or ozziepeewee@gmail.com

🚐🏕️🚐🏕️🚐🏕️🚐🏕️🚐🏕️

HASH FLASH

All the photos from Run #1496

MISMANAGEMENT 2025

Contacts for committee members.. tho’ its just as easy to use messenger.. or just ask a stupid question on the facebook page… There will always be someone willing to give you an answer.

Run reports: Please send directly to Xena by Sunday lunchtime at melaniebryant2901@gmail.com

If you are away the week you have been nominated to do a run report, could you please let Xena know so that a replacement can be organised.