Chardonnay’s You May Kiss Me Trail – R*n 1410
18 April 2024 from The Polish Club Club, New Town
Hare: Herr Flick
Run Reporter: Clearfell

Chardonnay HHH returned to the Polish Club in New Town for run number 1410 for a promised ‘run of the year’ by Herr Flick.

The Polish Club is the home of the Tasmanian Polish Association, which was formed by post-World War II Polish immigrants in 1950. It is venue which has a long association with CH3 members and the club including:

• Our esteemed recent Grand Mistress, Cereal Box, meeting her first husband at age 17 at the club.
• Multiple Chardonnay Cups run by Growler which involved setting up the cup running course in the hall.
• A Posh Ball
• Numerous CH3 runs with formidable catering by Mumma Maria.

Hare Flick planned our return to the Polish Club on New Town Road for many weeks including consideration of our menu on our last run from the Buckingham Bowls Club, where he canvassed food trucks in New Town Road while following trail. He also established that a membership of the Polish Club was necessary – surprisingly, he was accepted, given the historical relationship between the Poles and the Gestapo!

It should also be noted that the Polish Club is the home of the Jokers Club and hosted such talent as Judith Lucy, Tom Ballard, Dave O’Neil and Australia’s favourite purple puppet, Randy. As it turned out on the night with Herr Flick’s trail, this was very appropriate.

Some 30 CH3 hashers gathered on a cool night as the mizzle and drizzle fell, and were sent into the night with runners (including Pole Dancer, Maximus, Snack Bar, Jack Shit, Wee Bev, and Sugar Babe) to the right down Claire Street, and walkers ahead up Augusta Road. The runners broke into fragments, with confusion raining in Stoke Street, order never to be regained. Walkers were led off by Grizzly, and Dyke, only to be outfoxed by the Joker’s trail, which actually went left into Mortimer Avenue. With some order regained, the walkers turned down Rupert Avenue and hence into New Town Road. Again, confusion reigned with the ‘On! On!’ call directing hashers into Commercial Road, only to be greeted by a number of runners coming from the other direction – someone going in the wrong direction, but who??? The runners turned into Commercial Lane, the walkers backtracked to the Winston Hotel corner where further confusion reigned – Hashers going in four different directions, never to be reunited.

Grizzly headed back up New Town Road not to be seen again; a breakaway group led by Brazilian and Hands On proceeded down Federal Street. LA and TopDek opted out and turned up Argyle Street with inside information from the NDIS crew of Communion and Cereal Box as to the venue of the Piss Stop. The remainder of the breakaway group proceeded down Federal to Letitia Street, into Lewis Street and hence to the Piss Stop in Wilson Street. Hashers straggled into the PissStop having covered an array of routes and different distances (NDIS – 2.07, 2.76; Walk – 3.25, 4.35, 4.39, 5.27; Run – 4.25, 6.85,10.17) to be able to stand around in the drizzle (never rains on a Hash run).  Some never made it to the PS having given up and returning to the Polish Club – Snack Bar, Wrectum.

Comments directed to Herr Flick were generally not the most endearing – “Worst run of the year”, “Not his best run”, “Shit run”, “Should have stayed at home”, “Bastard”, etc. Herr Flick’s response – “The rain washed markings out”, “Had the wrong dribble dropper”, “Easy to follow” etc. Should have just used the Joker card, which would have been in keeping with the Jokers Club.

The Lip session – broken up by the late arrival of great pizzas – produced some awful jokes, not in keeping with the high standard of the Jokers Club.

The verdict – “Worst run of the year”, “Best Jokers’ run of the year” .

Clearfell.

DOWN DOWNS

Lip session with interval!

• Johnny Fuckacarcass, Rotten, Xena, Maximus, Sugar Babe– c*untry members. 
• Wrectum – couldn’t follow trail so made his own drink stop at the Queens Head with TicToc. 
• Scary Eyeball – drove to p!ss stop, which was 250m from the venue.
• Herr Flick – run of the year!! (place ‘worst’ whereever you see fit)  
• Herr Flick – perhaps would have more sucess setting trail AFTER his eye surgery tomorrow
• Jacques le Poo – no falls, just shakes as he passed the ‘danger zone’
• Celebration of mistresses life – Anzac Day/ lindisfarne rowing club, 11.30am 
• Arsecutter – Hashy birthday far kew
• Prickit – being told off for Pole Dancing 
• Hooray, Scary Eyeball, and Johnny Fuckcarcass – joke-off

NEXT RUN

Run 1411 – 25 April 2024
HARE APPARENT: Hooray
STARTING FROM: Waterfront Hotel, Bellerive
RUN REPORTER: Lone Arranger
$5 run fee – buy your own food and drinks at the venue.

RECEDING HARELINE

UP CUMMING EVENTS

• 7-9 June 2024 | Chardonnay Highland Fling @ Gowrie Park
• 24 June 2024 | Combined Clubs Charity Run in support of Gynaecological Cancer Research
• 28-30 March 2025 | Aussie Nash Hash 2025, Fremantle
• 8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

HASH FLASH

All the photos from Run 1410

MISMANAGEMENT 2024

Contacts for committee members.. tho’ its just as easy to use messenger.. or just ask a stupid question on the facebook page… There will always be someone willing to give you an answer.